Random

I dunno when I wud get to know the chemistry of other ppl. Ppl who are around me….whom I know. Some of them like my company…feels pleasure in my presence and makes me feel like sumone whereas sum just hate me…dislike me, loathe me…can’t even stand me. It’s a deep mystery. I dunno why when all the time am the same with everybody…the same self…..without any pretending then why sum hate me n sum love me??I dunno why sum ppl have dirty mind n cheap thought. Why don’t they think before pointing at sumbody not knowing that the rest of the fingers point at their own self. Why don’t they stand in other ppl’s shoes to feel the things with their point of view….see the things from their eyes.Why this world has become a mere cage of deceit…only treachery dominates here…why feelings don’t have any place here anymore..??Everybody thinks that whtever he’s doing is perfectly rite….why don’t they think before taunting and saying trash abt other ppl…I must add here saying things abt those ppl who they don’t even know...then why the hell do they spit crap!!!!Oh God! I never wish to think bad abt these ppl. I just want to forgive them…I know it’s the best act in ur eyes, God, but I am only a human being.No matter how hard I hold my tongue….grip my mind…sometime I just can’t tolerate anything. God, you are above all…above everything, you are the Al-might….the Al-merciful but wht am i??...A simple sinful human being…
So God it’s just too hard to control my anger and frustration when ppl do bad with me or with anybody else…Its not being bad and harsh just once but again n again and after all God am just a human…I can’t forgive them always….no matter how hard I try. I wish the person who does bad…thinks trash abt others without knowing them…just breaks his legs….fractures his arm…..falls down frm a tree….or at least the same thing happens to him…that sumone else also says trash abt him…thinks bad. Just to give him the taste of his own medicine.I just dunno why ppl do bad to others, why don’t they care about others feelings.Why don they reckon that today they are hurting someone but tomorrow they can also get hurt by someone they love, cherish n adore. You know wht…I do pray that sumthing like this happens to them. That someone they treasure…betrays them. Only then they wud feel it…only then they wud stand in other ppls shoes.I do wish…just to make them taste their own medicine….

Estranged soul..

Non of it comes to me..
why from truth do ppl flee?
non of it makes sense to me..
why get jealous frm other's glee?
non of it i understand..why curse the inevitable fate's hand?
non of these would i ever..
acknowledge neither perceive, never
Estranged soul i have become..
little love left for one to cherish.
hatred now dominates the passion,
little truth, little love, little trust
that was miraculously left...
now begins to crumble down with the crust.
non of it washes down to me...
give it some thought...won't ye??
estranged soul else u would be..!

I Exist...

the only light
is the candle flickering,
the love-stricken "parwanas"
leaping to it, then burning.
sacrificing all their life..
i feel like one of them..
so much burning alike.
in the cycle of re-births,
i born to die again..
to lessen this intense pain.
i dwell in this vast clan,
not any identity i have..
for you i want to live,
i burn again for another life...
all this i can not resist,
i want you to know..
i breathe...i live...i die..I Exist..!

Silent night

i drifted deep into the silent night,
trying to hold onto my life...with all my might,
Frozen are the eyes, for the warmths taken away,
from the heaviness of my heart...i stagger...i sway...
being stabbed i feel..with all the harshness i behold,
frosted are m'tears, emotions are m'cold,
pushed me, u did, ruthlessly in the pain.
left me so alone, in this pourin rain.
I question the Lord..ask for the mercy...is this all i get, is this all i gain?
for the love i held, for the truth i bled,
everything turns grey...the flowres just decay.
is this the fulfillment of all the time, i did, pray?
writhrin in sorrow, every second i die.
the moans i buried, in m'shattered self.
in all this hatred, finally i melt.
u never tried to feel the love, the pureness u never felt.
in this abyss, i now helplessly fall.
with the heart so broken, swollen are my feet.
i restore my path...the never ending journey i greet..
in the search of the answer, from the Lord above....
Is this pain the reward....of the fact i still love..???